There are countless movies portraying sisterhood and the bond that we share, spanning everything from outfit advice to motherhood tips. But have you ever felt it: the kind of sisterhood that touches your soul? It pulls the laughter from the depths of your belly, makes your sides ache as the tears stroll down your cheeks, and you release uninhibited snorts of laughter. Such a jubilant form of happiness!
For many generations, women have supported one another and been each other's backbone. Prior to any feminist movements, women were forced to rely on men for the sheer purpose of survival. We were grouped together for tasks such as serving and taking care of others children; so many friendships were pushed upon us by circumstance. I believe the sisterhood so many of us have is presently built far differently than friendships and sisterhood of the past.
Now, more than ever, women are becoming the primary providers for their families. We are juggling the boss from hell, the bills that pop up for things you didn't know you had bills for, the never ending bake sales, and wanting to be the best mum ever. It all requires the support of a tribe. We could easily exist in our own homemade bubbles of the cycle of life, but we choose not too. We choose to seek one another out like lemonade on a hot summer’s day.
Think about the time spent with your own girls: Sunday morning coffee, weekend brunch once a month, or maybe a regular girls night together. What traditions help you thrive?
As a little girl I hungered for Tuesday evenings when my mum would have girls night with her sisters. They would stumble into the house, legs too sore from an hour of “keep fit” at the local high school gym, but giggling like teenagers over how they couldn't move like the “good old days”. I would sneak out of bed and hide behind the door, listening to their stories until one of them would notice me, and beckon me in. I probably stayed ten minutes at the most, but the memories are etched so clearly in my heart. I was in love with their bond, and I wanted to wrap myself up in it like a cashmere blanket. These women had found one of the keys of life. Making time for themselves lifted their spirits and gave them confidence, not just as women but as mothers, too.
Many cultures around the world embrace women. Our succulent personalities, the ability to release our emotions fearlessly, or our never-ending curves that give way for new generations, not to mention the vivaciousness with which we protect our children. Nonetheless, we are often met with resistance in our supposed land of the free. If we are too passionate about a work project, we are labeled as an emotional wreck. If we reject a man’s advances in a corporate environment, we must be PMS-ing because let's face it, who wouldn't want to be with an overly aggressive type-A male who stands far too close to every female colleague, eyeing her like a piece of meat.
This is why I tribe.
Finding a space for us to be women and partners, in addition to being mothers, is essential to our well being. There are scientific studies that show a woman has a higher chance of survival during an illness if she has a tribe. We need a group of sisters that are connected by soul. There is a clarity one feels after talking to a girlfriend. We can feel the sun shining brightly on us even in the midnight hour of our girls night.
My sisterhood is a tribe of women who move my soul each time we meet. Sisterhood saves you from pain, and at the same time allows you to relieve someone's troubles. Sisterhood is a friend that calls you out on your rubbish, a friend who tells you how proud she is when no one else does. She knows when you’re struggling and is connected so deeply she is able to feel your pain as her own.
We are in an age where the world is in its adolescence, struggling to find the way and travel a good path. Now, more than ever, each of us needs a strong sisterhood.
Surround yourself with friends who remain by your side, in sunshine and in shade.
JOURNALIST: Natasha Badkoubei